No mom's guilt on this one.

When I was a stay at home mom I felt so guilty everytime I did something for myself, I think part of it was my job was the kids and that job was never done. Last night I played Mah Jongg with 4 other women 3 of us work and 2 of them stay at home with the kids. It was interesting because those of us who work felt entitled to our time alone, I was telling them about my hectic day I had planned for today, for my birthday last year a group of my friends had bought me a gift certificate to a spa so this afternoon I am using it and I decided to make a day of it - full pampered day. The stay at home moms were horrified, they barely get out of the house for the weekly Mah Jongg game let alone a full day of pampering. I feel entitled and deserving of it, its a long week and while I certainly do not get to spend as much time with my kids as they do, I feel we manage to spend plenty of quality time. I used to feel trapped by being at home, by nightfall I was ready to jump out a window, now I am still frazzled by a hectic schedule but I enjoy my time with my kids so much more, it feels like a treat. I will play hooky from work when they are home from school for vacation and we can do fun stuff. It feels exciting for both of us.

I have tons of guilt on so many topics when it comes to my kids, thankfully this is not one of them. I feel empowered by what I do and I feel its my responsibility as a mother to teach my girls how to be a content in their lives outside their families and define who they are. Let them find what works for them because my best advice that a friend of mine's mom gave me was happy mothers make happy kids.